THE house! :o/

I sit here tonight with a very sad heart. I found the house and loss the house all in the same night. This morning I saw a great listing. I sent it to my realtor right away and we scheduled an appt right at 5 to see the house. All day I waited, wondered, and thought this could be the one. I looked at the pictures over and over and strolled through the whole neighborhood on google maps.  

Finally it was 5 o’clock and off I went. I met up with my mom, dad, and little sister. We arrived at the house and I was pleasantly surprised. The curb appeal was cute as a button. We walked in the front door and immediately felt a warm positive energy. Each of us explored different areas before meeting back in the living room. This WAS the house. It may not have been the most beautiful house- but this house was filled with character and I loved it.

We then started to run numbers- being I am doing this all on my own there is little to no flexibility when it comes to wiggle room.  This listing had only been on the market 1 day and already had been shown 4 times.  Those 2 reasons alone planted doubt in all of our minds. Trying to be positive and never give up hope all of us continued to smile without expressing any doubt.  We all continued to chat in the living room when my little sister surprised me. She walked up to the realtor looked at her with her pretty blue eyes and said “Can you please help my sister buy this house?”  To my realtors response “I am sure going to try.”

As we were leaving the owner was walking in. She was nice, friendly, and talkative. She told us the story behind the house and all the memories that filled the house.  After speaking to her for about 15 minutes I knew this was my house- but I also knew that we would have to move quickly.

We then walked outside and agreed on an offer. I knew my chances were close to none but I could not give up just yet.

As I crawled into my mom’s car the tears started. I had finally found the perfect house- and it was still so far out of reach. Why couldn’t I be the only offer? Why couldn’t I afford more? Why couldn’t this be my house? These were all questions I asked out loud as the tears fell.

I wish I could tell you that my offer was accepted- and that all my future promises for the house out beat all the other offers- but tonight that house has a new potential owner and it is not this gal that is sitting on her couch- drinking wine- and crying.  The house turned out not to be the house after all.

I have sat here and cried most of the evening- but as I was writing this many thoughts have popped into my head? The first thought being-this house had a really special feel to it- but this was also the first house that I had my dad and little sister join us at. And now that I think of it- yes this house was a great house- but the best feeling was having my dad, mom, and little sister there supporting me. Watching my little sister run around with excitement made us all smile and LOVE the house.  This little 7 year old was the reason for all the positive energy.

Overall, I am still going to cry and feel sorry for myself probably the rest of the night. But when I DO find the house- I know it will be PERFECT! Because I don’t just have 1 little sister to bring happiness into a house.. I have 3 little nieces to bring it as well! 

<3,

Shirelle

Do the work.... make the change!! :))

Well it's official... my 15 minutes of fame has come to an end. I will now be training employees how to use a company credit card. Very exciting for the most part but leaving my current position is going to be very bitter sweet. The bitter part being I don't get to wear jeans everyday the sweet part being- I am pretty much a mini baller in the making! :))

Over the past few months I have had many doors open up for me- in fact I have even been hit right in the face by a few. I guess the saying when one door closes another door opens is actually true- at least in my book. But even with all the blessings coming my way I cannot help but think of all the mountains I have climbed to get here- and how thankful I am for all the people who have doggy paddled under me when I was drowning myself.

3 months ago- My life was chaos. Actually to be quite honest- you know the girl that is not happy in a current situation? Complains about her life constantly? Cries about not being respected? Lacks all self esteem and confidence? Makes excuses for the piece of crap in her life? Talks about change- but never makes the change?

YUP! That girl WAS me. 3 months ago I was miserable! In fact in the words of my brestfriend I was drowning myself- and as much as my friends and family wanted to help.. this Stubborn girl was going to have to fall flat on her face before any changes would be made. And that was not even a guarantee. after all I had fell on my face many times and ended up in the same situation.  

Well I am sure you can guess what happened next. This girl right here- fell on her face ONCE again! But this time instead of feeling sorry for myself and blaming someone else- I took full responsibility. And what happened next is my favorite part.

I got back up and started to get my life back together. No it was not easy- no it was not the life I had planned- and no it did not include a person that at one time I thought was my whole life.

I was building from ground up and I was determined to make a change- and for only one person MYSELF!  And guess what? I have made many changes since and continue to make changes daily. This mountain has not been easy- in fact there are times where I want to jump off this damn mountain.. but there are a few things keeping me on:

My faith, hope, and determination. After all look at me now. I recently was just involved in a tug of war between 2 departments, I am currently looking to buy my own house, and best of all the life I had not planned for- is turning out to be the life I have always wanted.

I didn't get here by luck- I am not just some lucky girl that was magically blessed with tons of amazing opportunities. Instead I have worked my butt off, took risks, got my self help from an amazing life coach, and for once STOPPED talking and STARTED doing.

So what's my message to you- It is never to late to start. If you want to lose the weight, if you want to get out of an unhealthy relationship, or if you want to make more money... well I have few pieces of advice for you... Put down the cheetos, drop the guy, and send out the resume!

Stop spending all your time talking about it- and actually start doing something about it!  Because at the end of the day-none of the excuses matter, it's not Tom, Dick, or Harry's fault, the little debbie does not magically walk into your mouth, and I hate to break it to you but we all are busy!

All things are possible- but you gotta do the work!

<3,
Shirelle

Standards and Cookies

Someone posted this picture the other day and I happened to scroll by it. I also happened to notice a comment that was attached to this photo reading:

No they don't guys looking for an easy lay do this ;)

I have to admit- I did not even know the girl posting the comment but I thought to myself- Gosh! how disgusting!  I continued to scroll but for some reason that "comment" bothered me.

So what did I do?!?! I totally over thought the whole comment and came up with this conclusion:

This comment is disgusting to me for many reasons. The first being- where are her standards? What are her expectations? Where is her self esteem, dignity, and respect?!?! And how many easy lays has she been- since it only takes opening a door?!?! Gosh- talk about a dirty cookie!

Now don't get me wrong- I could totally be wrong about this girl and her values- She may have a very clean cookie!?  BUT  it did bring light to a situation that is very important to me.

Hey Shirelle- any special men in your life? Hey Shirelle how is the dating life going? Hey Shirelle have you went on any dates yet??!!? Hey Shirelle, I am sooo shocked you have not went on any dates you should get a life and get out more.

This is a daily question that I am asked. And truth is- until last night and this morning I always scrabbled for an answer. But after giving this question thought I found my answer... SOOO here it is!!

Yes, I am single. Yes, I would like to meet someone. And Yes, I have a life- because guess what YOU CAN live without a man.

Now why am I not dating Tom, Dick, and Sally- Well for starters Sally does not have a penis, Tom is stuck in the " I don't know phase" and Dick- well... yea he is just that.. A DICK!

Over the past year I have been more than available. (So I thought) I have really put myself out there and handed out that business card- Heck like I have mentioned before if you are a hot waiter in ABQ you most likely have my card. And yes I have got quite a response- in fact the last time I handed it out I received a text within 2 hours! WOOOOHOOOO- That's a new record!!!

So again why am I still single? After all I am getting responses. But are these responses that I really want? Come to think of it- this has become more of an attention game for me- and a regular routine.

Friday night- We go out. We SCORE the HOT waiter. I smile- I flirt- I leave my number. Later that night I get a TEXT message- I get all giddy- We text back and forth for a little while- and after a few weeks- I am bored with it- he is bored with me- and the texts stop. BUT no worries there is always a new restaurant and another Friday night! *Get the hint Shirelle*

*Hey I have an idea- How about I actually give my number to someone that has the potential of meeting my standards?! Am I scared? Do I not have the confidence? Where is my self esteem?

Truth is- I don't want the waiter- I want the general manager- I want the marketing director, I want the man with the future- I could careless about the money- but I want the man that has a plan! Now why don't I give my number to the man with the plan? I am intimated by him- I lack the confidence- I don't think he will be interested in this 26 year old volunteer coordinator- BUT GUESS WHAT?!?! I am wrong! These men do not know what I offer just as much as I don't know what they offer. And guess what- it does not matter where you've been, where you are, and where you are going. If you KNOW what you want, are confident in what you want, and are dedicated to what you want- YOU WILL GET WHAT YOU WANT!

I want someone that is: ambitious, motivated, faithful, honest, dedicated, respectful, and fun! I want a MAN that will call and not text. I want a man that will challenge me. I want a man that will make me laugh, laugh with me, and laugh at me at times. I want a man that is going to encourage me when I have doubts, and support me when I feel strong. I want a man that knows WHAT HE WANTS!

These are all the things I want in a man- There may not be all the things I GET in a man- but this girl has standards and guess what- It's about time I start following them!

How am I going to do this- I am going to find out exactly what I want in life! But not just for a relationship. What I want for myself, where I want to be in 5 years, and what I am passionate about. I have high standards and high expectations- and I want to be able to meet those just as much as I want my future husband to meet those!!!

So in the end- Yes, I am single-and when the RIGHT man comes my way- I am going to know exactly what I have to offer because- I am not just some volunteer coordinator- I am a volunteer coordinator- with a clean cookie- and a HELL OF A CATCH!

<3,
Shirelle

Being bitter doesn't make you better!

There is Nothing like a little game of Bullshit.

Bullshit is card game about lying and deception just as much as it is about cunning and skill. The object of a game of Bullshit is to get rid of all your cards before anyone else. This is done in a relatively orderly fashion, but the best thing is that all cards are face down and a player can lie their head off about what they put on the table. The only way this can catch up with a player is if someone calls their bluff.

I love to play bullshit. There is something about sitting around the table with your friends and family and calling them out... not to mention hearing your grandma yell BULLSHIT is pretty much priceless.

Well let's pretend we are playing a game of Bullshit. But before we even start let me ask you a few questions?!?

How many times do you find yourself on facebook throughout the day?

When is the last time you gave someone a compliment?

When is the last time you "liked" someone's picture?

How many comments have you read- smiled- and continued scrolling?

How many times have you seen a birthday update- and simply ignored it and did not send a birthday wish?

How many times did you see something great going on in SOMEONE else's life but you just ignored it?

How many times have you click on someone's picture- observed everything about the picture but instead of "liking it" or "commenting on it" you simply clicked out.

If you can tell me at least one of these questions do not relate to you... I have one word for you... BULLSHIT!

Why I am calling your bluff? Because we all have done it, still do it, and will continue to do it. But why?? Why do we do this? Why don't we take that time to send that simple little birthday wish? Why don't we take the time to "like" a status? Why don't we take the time to leave a comment on someone's picture?

After all on facebook all these people are considered "friends" right? So what does it come down to?!? Jealousy? Your 2 busy? You don't want to get all the other comment updates? I am sure I can think of 100 other reasons but truth is- If you have the time to be on FB you have the time to simply click the "like button".

But instead of calling your bluff... hell I am going to call mine as well. I have been this girl. I have ignored that birthday wish- I have looked at that picture and did not say a damn word- and I have not acknowledged someone's accomplishment. And where has this got me... no where really. I mean who really knows? Half the time I am alone when I am looking at fb anyway. So what's the big deal?

Well to me it is a very big deal. I like to get compliments. Who doesn't like to be called pretty? Who doesn't like to be told Great job!! Who doesn't like to get a birthday wish from an old friend?

Overall, it really comes down to ourselves. But this has been added to my list of things I will work on.  Not because I feel like it will make me "LOOK" better. Simply because I want to be the girl that can give a compliment just as easy as I can take a compliment. :)

Final words-

DON'T BE THIS SOMEONE!

<3,

Shirelle

Pass the Mustard

There are some people in this world gifted with a true blessing. The gift of listening! When someone goes to them about a problem- they actually LISTEN. Well.... let's just say I am not part of this "some". Infact I am probably the worst listener- Come to me if you want my 20 cents because heck if I just stop at 2. I will tell you what I think, what you should think, and probably what the guy sitting two tables down from us is thinking.

This being said- I am really trying to work on my listening skills. It's been quite the challenge but give my some mustard and talk away.

Who would have ever thought mustard would be the one thing that kept my mouth shut?!? Well yes the magic sauce has been mustard!

My little cousin has many great qualities but one of her best is listening. If I am upset, pissed off, or want to run away she is one of my first calls.. well actually second call.  I always recruit one of the besties to run away with me or to be ready to back me up when I forget I am only 5 feet tall and don't punch very hard! But back to the little cousin. Why do I call her? Because she listens. She listens to me so well I often have to say- Hey are you there??!?!?! Anyhow this has always been a quality I LOVE about her. BUT it is not a quality WE share. When she calls me- I am quite the opposite. I listen for 2 minutes and the rest of the conversation is ME telling her what to do, how to feel, and how to act. Gosh- come to think about this- I really suck at listening.

Well this all changed one evening at Wendy's. Her and I had met for dinner. The conversation started off as the usual-what we found on pinterest, what we had for lunch, and when would be a good time to raid each other's closet. After little discussion she then asked me-Hey are you ready to practice those listening skills?! To my reply- Yes! I mean really how hard could this be?? Well let's just be honest a lot harder for a girl named Shirelle. She started talking and YUP... 2 minutes later I started talking!! Well let's just say- I was not talking for long before the dang mustard was not sitting in front of me!

SHIRELLE!!!- You are only allowed to talk when the mustard is NOT in front of you- if the mustard is in front of me just sit there... shut up... and listen! Holy Moly who knew MUSTARD could hold sooo much power!! But I will tell you one thing- I listened alright and that mustard stayed in front of her MOST of the night- (I mean come on there were a few times I had to grab the mustard just to express bad words!) But for once in a very long time- I actually listened to someone who needed an ear.

When people express their issues to us 95% of the time they want to vent. They are calling you to listen not to hear about what YOU would do, how it relates to YOU, or YOUR own daily issues. I can only speak for myself on this- because hell I think I have done enough speaking and thinking for everyone... but I want to be a better listener! And if that means I have to carry a bottle of mustard in my purse to remind me to shut my mouth- hell feel free to bring a hamburger with the issue!

So in the end! The next time someone comes to you with their bad day- JUST LISTEN... and if can't do that... you better start passing the mustard~!

<3,

Shirelle

Put some trust in the Big Man! :)

Dear God,

Please bring a great, handsome, intelligent man into my life. I am ready for the next chapter in my life and I need your help. God, please help me find him. I know with your help I will find him- I TRUST YOU.

Amen

P.S.

Oh and God can you make it the UPS guy because let’s just be honest- I like him! I like him a lot; I think he would be perfect for me, And God he would get along GREAT with my family. Oh and he seems interested in me already so I think it would be a great match. I know I trust you God but let’s just do it my way. :))))))

Sound familiar? Ha-ha! Well this is just a typical conversation I have with the Big Man. I am the first one to say- Just put it in God’s hands.  10 minutes later- Um… God can I have that back?

One of the biggest obstacles I have is trusting my Faith.  I am so quick to ask for prayers but I am not the most grateful person when things don’t go my way. After all- we all know what is the best for us right?

WRONG- if things always went my way who knows where I would be.  Actually I have a few ideas of where I would be- and I am pretty sure that is not where I want to be. When I was little I would always pray for a minivan. Oooooh the joy of the sliding door…. Uhhhh.. I am 26 now and let’s just say I am SOOOO GLAD I AM NOT DRIVING A MINI VAN!  Could you imagine- Hey there cute guy!?! Wanna slide my door. Hahahahaha I think I’ll pass!

So how do I get over this obstacle? I put it in God’s hands- Trust God- and leave it with God.

Simple right? Not so much- but it’s something I am working on.

I truly believe that God has a plan for me!  And I am sure I will continue to give him suggestions of how I want that plan to go. But let’s be honest- What’s meant to be will be!

So the next time things don’t go your way- It’s ok to feel down for a little while. But just remember there is a lot that happens behind the scenes and things will fall into place when you least expect it. Oh and if not pray louder maybe he can’t hear you! J

 

<3,

Shirelle

Think before you speak! :)

Learn to smile at every situation. See it as an opportunity to prove your strength and ability. ~Joe Brown

The quote above hit me hard this morning. For the past few months I have been fighting an ugly battle with the hair monster- and it has not been pretty. If there is one thing I am known for it would have to be my hair. I was introduced to a teasing brush a few years ago- and it has become my better half. I tease the hell out of hair all day every day. Some don't like big hair- I happen to LOVE big hair.

 
Well this stupid little monster decided to attack my Big Style Wedding hair at the end of last year. One word describes it all- Heartbroken. The right side of my hair started breaking off- or should I say more like chunking off. I was missing chunks of my hair and I was devastated. Luckily being I have mastered the teasing method I was able to fill in many of the empty spots- but it was not going to last for long.

 
Finally after gallons of coconut oil, bottles of leave in conditioner, and washing my hair in holy water (yes I went that far) I decided to take care of business. To Mastercuts I went- and so did my big hair! :( There was no miracle for my Big Style Wedding Hair and I left with a stylish cut above my shoulders.

 
It has been a couple days now and I am adjusting to my new short hairdo. Some days I love it and other days I pull on it. Overall, it is just going to take some teasing, hairspray, LOTS OF TIME, and a good attitude to adjust to this new hairdo.

 
Which brings me to the reason why I wrote this post. Having a new hairdo has introduced me to the everyone has an opinion club. Some love it and some well.... yeah they don't. I have been told- GOSH!!! Look how cute your hair is- to a silent reaction- to a straight up WHAT THE HELL DID YOU DO?!?!! ( Well, I simply got in a fight with the hair monster bit*h and I will send him your way!!) Don't worry I said it in a friendly tone. ;)

 
*ANYWAYS*- Now that I have had my fair share of the "everyone has an opinion club" it has made me reflect on my own opinions- and how I chose to voice them. I am sure I am guilty of not making someone feel super fantastic about a recent change or situation they have encountered. And No I cannot fix what I may have said- but I can approach a situation better in the future.

 
In the end we need to remember- everyone is fighting their own monster. And sometimes the biggest monster is the negative person with the bad attitude. No one wants to make a change that does not better them- but sometimes temporary changes need to be made to get an even greater outcome!

This being said- I am not sure where the future of my Big Style Wedding hair will go- but I do know one thing- I will rock the hell out of this short cut and continue to send the hair monster to the negative people and their crappy attitudes!

 
<3,

Shirelle